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I. OPINION
  1. Staff Profiles

  2. Letters to Lao Vision
II. EDUCATION
  1. Considering Graduate School?
    2. by Douangchit Mounghane
  2. The Reward

    3. by Douangdeuane Douangdara
  3. Who Are the Lao?

    4. by Douangdeuane Douangdara
  4. Lao Geography

    5. by Douangdeuane Douangdara
III. CULTURE
  1. Lao Weddings

    2. by Montha Phavongxay
  2. Will You Not Miss Us?

    3. by Check Kirivong
  3. Lao New Year
    ປີໃຫມ່ລາວ
    (Lao & Eng.)
    by Douangdeuane Douangdara

  4. Growing Up Lao in America

    5. by Douangchit Mounghane
IV. FEATURE
  1. Who Makes Your Decisions?

    2. by Anonymous
  2. Colors in Between

    3. by Von PhrakonKham
  3. Interracial Relationships

    4. by Check Kirivong
  4. Children of War

    5. by Douangdeuane Douangdara
  5. You Ask Me Why

    6. by Von PhrakonKham
V. LITERATURE
  1. ຮີດ ສິບສອງ

    2. by Douangdeuane Douangdara
  2. Five Minutes

    3. by Von PhrakonKham
  3. Maa Thao

    4. by Von PhrakonKham
  4. ເລືອດລາວ

    5. by Douangdeuane Douangdara
  5. When Your Timing Is Ripe

    6. by Sounantha Phoumarath
VI. PROFILE
  1. Steve's Interview

    2. by Von PhrakonKham
VII. HEALTH
  1. Tobacco and Our Health

    2. by Douangchit Mounghane
VIII. RICE AND JAEW
  1. Recipes

    2. by Montha Phavongxay
  2. ສີ່ງທີ່ຄວນຄິດ
    by Sounantha Phoumarath

  3. Growing Up in the Eighties

    4. by Douangchit Mounghane
  4. Marriage: On Love Alone?
    by Sounantha Phoumarath


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Growing up in America: One Lao child's experience
By Douangchit Mounghane

My family arrived in Illinois, December 1980, from our holding spot in the Philippines. My initial curiosity was to the snow. What was this soft, flaky thing falling from the sky that had painted the town so beautifully white? One day, I saw other kids eating it. I remember running into the house yelling, "Mom, did you know that you can eat that white stuff outside?" I definitely had a lot of fun exploring snow.

I also cannot forget my first day at school. When the bell rang, I was the last one out of the classroom. While my peers went around the back to the playground, I walked out front, wondering how everyone had disappeared so quickly. I remember thinking to myself: that they must live close by. As I approached the front steps to our home, my teacher drove up in her car, came out, and attempted to drag me to the car. In confusion and fear, I resisted and began to point at our home trying to communicate, "I live here!" I did not speak English at the time and was frustrated at my inability to communicate. Anyhow, as soon as she saw tears pushing through my eyes, she released me and drove away. I did not understand her intentions until years later, how was I to have known that it was the recess bell and not the end of the school day?

As I began to learn English and make friends of my own, I also began to learn many neat children's tales. My American friends told me that if you lose a tooth and put it under your pillow, a tooth fairy will come for it and give you money! Wow! I thought. If I put all the teeth I lost under my pillow, I would be rich! But each time I put a tooth under my pillow, the tooth fairy never came to visit. I tried every suggestion: sleeping with my window open, putting my tooth in a special pouch for the fairy, etc. I just could not understand why she never visited ME. What frustration! Hmm, I must be a bad kid, oh well.

My second childhood disappointment was Santa Clause. I would stay up late waiting for him and his reindeers to visit but by morning I had seen neither Santa nor his reindeers and had not been left any gifts.

Do you remember wanting to go to sleepovers? I do. I am the only child and longed for time with friends my age and for some reason Mom would never allow me to attend sleepovers. Sure, there are no such things as sleepover parties in Laos; she might have been cautious about my safety, or was afraid I might wet the beds of the friends who had invited me to spend the night; nonetheless, I sometimes cannot help feeling robbed of my childhood.

Let us move on to the adolescent years. How many of you were prohibited from taking phone calls and letters from someone of the opposite sex? Most of you Lao girls were probably not allowed to, and were highly restricted in your social activities, while in general the guys received the laissez faire (hands off) approach. I was instructed that I could not date until I had completed all my education, including graduate school! How unrealistic was this expectation? It is clear why my overprotective Mom and I never got along during those tender years.

Looking back, I can now share my experiences and have a good laugh. Somehow, through all my challenges and cultural clashes, I remained resilient and well adjusted. Mom is now a role model to me. I am grateful to have had her loving guidance and am indebted to her for the person I have become. As little as she had known about the challenges I experienced growing up in America, I am certain that unbeknownst to me she also had her own challenges.
 
 

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